Hon. Merle Pumpernickel
Forward-ish Party
"Fighting for what matters. Probably."
Platform Issues
01Requiring all school cafeterias to have a Michelin rating
02Tax credits for people who use their turn signal consistently
03Requiring all press conferences to include one honest answer
04Requiring all fortune cookies to contain actionable financial advice
Ask Hon. Merle Pumpernickel anything. They won't answer it.
This politician is fictional. Any resemblance to actual politicians is entirely the point.